6 months

Monday is my six month anniversary with Deloitte, the nagging and needy mistress. She has required much of me, leaving me little time for life and meaningful friendships. Yet I stay committed and persevere.

In all the work I have found it very difficult to find any type of purpose. Why do I subject myself to this? What need to I have for all this money without time to spend it? Even more upsetting is the fact that I have no time to find a pretty little lady to invest in.

My body is young, and it itches for action that I deny it during most of my waking ours. Why do I do this to myself? There will be a time later in life to commit to work. Does it make sense to do this now when I am unfettered as a man can be? Time in an office has taught me that men are definitely made in the image of God - I need to be in the wild, to be free.

I know I am in my job because God has led me here, so I am trying to ride my doubt out. I do not need to know God's reasoning, but sometimes I think it would easier if I did. The most I know is that this is where I need to be. He even told me so one day last month as I was driving to work. He said, "Son, this is there I have put you." What comfort that gave for a day or so! Oh that I would have more faith, that I would trust more.